I don't know if anyone reading know or cares, but as you can clearly see on my sad little banner a few posts down, I only got to 8K words... Midterms and papers quashed that dream like a bug. But I'm really happy with what I accomplished, and I definately want to keep up with the story. I will most likely try again next November.
"You and I will fly out of this town/here tonight leave all solid ground/You and I will fly out of this town/Half blind, leave the underground"
Sunday, December 12, 2010
I'm Melting
So I just want to preface this post by saying that I love my life, and I am not as unhappy and lonely as my last post would suggest... I just didn't get around to the second half where I talk about IRL adventures I had with my best friend or how great it was having my sister back in town for a few days... But trust me it happened.
Today, or rather tonight as it is getting late(10:45PM Really?, I want to talk about how I feel like I am melting both literally and metaphorically.
Let's start with the literal shall we?
So, my lovely computer is pushing 4 or so years(in tech-years that makes it practically archaic)and it's starting to show signs that it's ready for the great-junk-heap-in-the-sky, it's getting pretty slow, and buggy but most annoyingly of all is that it the fan is going. Which basically means that it will alternate between getting so hot it actually hurts to touch it, and whirring so loud you'd think I lived under a flight path. Which I guess given the alternative isn't so bad, but still. I talked to my dad, an expert in all things tech, and showed him how hot it was. He actually expressed genuine worry. He doesn't do that, ever... So not only is my room aproaching 30*, with the window open, but I have the ever impending fear that it is going to explode. (And I've had a computer explode before)
Metaphorically, I have my third of five exams tomorrow, on Human Osteology. I really like the subject, but I kinda have to Ace the exam if I want to pass the course, because the midterms killed me. I've been studying off and on since 10:00AM this morning, and I feel like my brain is going to melt out my ears or something... I'd like to think I've retained everything, but right now all I can think of are the horrible bone diseases I could have... and not *just* hypochondria, but like, diseases brought on by anaemia, of which I was borderline the last time I had bloodwork done. Which was at least three, maybe four years ago. So now I have horrible mental images of my possible Porotic Hypertosis and Cribia Orbitalia. Ok, maybe I am just being a hypochondriac... but WHAT IF?!
So there you have it, not my most eloquent post, but as a late night//last minute post it's pretty good. My laptop is on fire, snow is blowing on my shoulder through the open window, and my brain is mush.
In other words, "I'm melting"
"And I know it's been/Such a long time/Since we've just been friends/And not soldiers on/The front line of a war/That we were born into/But we've got to do this together/Don't leave me"
Today, or rather tonight as it is getting late(10:45PM Really?, I want to talk about how I feel like I am melting both literally and metaphorically.
Let's start with the literal shall we?
So, my lovely computer is pushing 4 or so years(in tech-years that makes it practically archaic)and it's starting to show signs that it's ready for the great-junk-heap-in-the-sky, it's getting pretty slow, and buggy but most annoyingly of all is that it the fan is going. Which basically means that it will alternate between getting so hot it actually hurts to touch it, and whirring so loud you'd think I lived under a flight path. Which I guess given the alternative isn't so bad, but still. I talked to my dad, an expert in all things tech, and showed him how hot it was. He actually expressed genuine worry. He doesn't do that, ever... So not only is my room aproaching 30*, with the window open, but I have the ever impending fear that it is going to explode. (And I've had a computer explode before)
Metaphorically, I have my third of five exams tomorrow, on Human Osteology. I really like the subject, but I kinda have to Ace the exam if I want to pass the course, because the midterms killed me. I've been studying off and on since 10:00AM this morning, and I feel like my brain is going to melt out my ears or something... I'd like to think I've retained everything, but right now all I can think of are the horrible bone diseases I could have... and not *just* hypochondria, but like, diseases brought on by anaemia, of which I was borderline the last time I had bloodwork done. Which was at least three, maybe four years ago. So now I have horrible mental images of my possible Porotic Hypertosis and Cribia Orbitalia. Ok, maybe I am just being a hypochondriac... but WHAT IF?!
So there you have it, not my most eloquent post, but as a late night//last minute post it's pretty good. My laptop is on fire, snow is blowing on my shoulder through the open window, and my brain is mush.
In other words, "I'm melting"
"And I know it's been/Such a long time/Since we've just been friends/And not soldiers on/The front line of a war/That we were born into/But we've got to do this together/Don't leave me"
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Solitary and Solidarity: an unconscious struggle
Somedays I just want to be alone, I go to school by myself, sit in my own private world, come home and proceed to hide out in my room till dinner.
Ok, I lied, that is most days for me.
The only time I get any social interaction is Friday morning cleaning, and the occasional between classes chat with my friends. And you know what? I'm totally ok with that. I always have been, ever since I was little.
Actually I was worse when I was little, my best friend was easily my TV. Oh course I played with my friends, but it was always, ALWAYS arranged by either my mum, or the other kid. Because the thing is, as much as I enjoy other people's company, I don't mind being alone.
I hardly ever get truly lonely. That being said, every now and then I get the urge to hang out with a friend, or she makes plans to see me and I realise how much I miss them.
I don't drink much and I hardly ever have disposable cash, so I don't go out to bars, but every now and then I hear classmates or friends talk about their weekend, and I feel isolated.
Most days it doesn't phase me at all that I have never had a boyfriend, never been on a date, never even been kissed. In fact most days it doesn't even cross my mind. Of course it gets hard when mom is CONSTANTLY reminding me. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes its funny, but it is always annoying... It's not that I would be opposed to dating someone if the opportunity came up, but I'm not actively seeking one out.
So I've adapted to ignoring her comments. Because the thing is, I do want a boyfriend sometimes, but there is nothing wrong with being happy without one, and despite being a hopeless romantic sap who is hardwired into wanting that Prince Charming to chase after me... it's not the lack of one that bothers me, but that the world, my mother especially, doesn't seem to think that I'll be whole or happy untill that happens for me. Now THAT hurts.
But I didn't start this post to complain about being single. I started it to talk about how much I love my friends, and how spending time with them reminds me how lucky I am.
This past week I got to spend good quality time with some of my favourite people, and I had so much fun!
I had planned to go more in depth about who I saw and what we did, and just how truly blessed I feel... but that was before I nearly fell asleep from sheer exhaustion!
So I shall post the angsty Solitary half and go to bed, hopefully I will have the time and energy to devote to the happy Solidarity half!
"I cannot believe my eyes/ how the world's full of fear and lies/ but it's plain to see evil inside of me/ is on the rise... I cannot believe my eyes/ is the world finally growing wise/ cause it seems to me/ some kind of harmony/ is on the rise"
Ok, I lied, that is most days for me.
The only time I get any social interaction is Friday morning cleaning, and the occasional between classes chat with my friends. And you know what? I'm totally ok with that. I always have been, ever since I was little.
Actually I was worse when I was little, my best friend was easily my TV. Oh course I played with my friends, but it was always, ALWAYS arranged by either my mum, or the other kid. Because the thing is, as much as I enjoy other people's company, I don't mind being alone.
I hardly ever get truly lonely. That being said, every now and then I get the urge to hang out with a friend, or she makes plans to see me and I realise how much I miss them.
I don't drink much and I hardly ever have disposable cash, so I don't go out to bars, but every now and then I hear classmates or friends talk about their weekend, and I feel isolated.
Most days it doesn't phase me at all that I have never had a boyfriend, never been on a date, never even been kissed. In fact most days it doesn't even cross my mind. Of course it gets hard when mom is CONSTANTLY reminding me. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes its funny, but it is always annoying... It's not that I would be opposed to dating someone if the opportunity came up, but I'm not actively seeking one out.
So I've adapted to ignoring her comments. Because the thing is, I do want a boyfriend sometimes, but there is nothing wrong with being happy without one, and despite being a hopeless romantic sap who is hardwired into wanting that Prince Charming to chase after me... it's not the lack of one that bothers me, but that the world, my mother especially, doesn't seem to think that I'll be whole or happy untill that happens for me. Now THAT hurts.
But I didn't start this post to complain about being single. I started it to talk about how much I love my friends, and how spending time with them reminds me how lucky I am.
This past week I got to spend good quality time with some of my favourite people, and I had so much fun!
I had planned to go more in depth about who I saw and what we did, and just how truly blessed I feel... but that was before I nearly fell asleep from sheer exhaustion!
So I shall post the angsty Solitary half and go to bed, hopefully I will have the time and energy to devote to the happy Solidarity half!
"I cannot believe my eyes/ how the world's full of fear and lies/ but it's plain to see evil inside of me/ is on the rise... I cannot believe my eyes/ is the world finally growing wise/ cause it seems to me/ some kind of harmony/ is on the rise"
Friday, October 29, 2010
NaNoWriMo, or how I am absolutely insane
Well it's official... I have decided to attempt NaNoWriMo this year...
What's that? you don't know what that is? here is a handy dandy lil' link!--> http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/whatisnano
Basically NA.tional NO.vel WRI.ting MO.nth is a combination writing contest / giving yourself permission to go a little mad for the month of November... In which you force yourself to churn out a 50K+ novel in 30 days, for kicks and giggles.
Now, for me, the IDEA itself is not crazy, as I did something similar when writing my first novel (my other blog) in my grade 12 WritersCraft class... The CRAZY part is that I'm a full time University student, and November is smack dab in the middle of second midterms and just before finals... So I'm going to be going slightly mad from school, and adding extra responsibility is probably the worst possible thing I can do to myself. That being said I really want to give it a go! I don't care if I get stressed and give up, I still want to be able to say I tried! (and if I come out with a kick-ass novel, well that's just a fringe benefit! ;P)
I have no worries that I won't be able to hit the minimum number of words in 30 days, I will either quit because I have to, or I will finish... even if it's complete and total crap. Quantity has NEVER been my problem when it comes to writing, in fact I often struggle with being CONCISE. It's the quality I'm worried about. But the whole point of NaNo is to force yourself to just write, not to fret or self-edit, or give up because you suck. The point is to just CRANK IT OUT, you can worry about the quality later... I mean honestly, if you ever think you are going to publish without some SERIOUS editing and revisions (even with the best of authors and most brilliant plotlines) you are a fool.
So this year I'm giving myself permission. Permission to try, to fail, and to suck. I give me the permission to surprise myself, no matter the outcome.
"Hey there baby it's party time/ spread the tablecloth, and pour the wine/ cause I know this is not the way you wanted to go/ but I know that you're doing fine"
Sunday, September 19, 2010
R2 Units and My Dad's DIY Skills
I have a bit of an obsession with R2D2 and my daddy has a bit of an obsession with building things... He's made one or two robots, that were VERY simple, but after stumbling across these links I have high hopes that I might one day have my own droid! The last link is the coolest but, the $120 case mod gives me the most hope that dad will make me one someday... I don't game, but if I ever did I think an R2 themed hub containing all of the major systems and some old school ones would be neat! Not only would it be epic, but it would also make my life easy... I would be able to buy ANY game and not have to worry about whether or not it is compatible with my system! Personally I'd want one anyway, regardless of whether I ever used it... I suppose I could play movies off of it...
p.s. my google chrome spell check wants me to change "Droid" to "Druid". Oh, spell check how I simultaneously love and hate thee!
p.p.s It doesn't recognise "google" identity-crisis fail?
http://gizmodo.com/5364521/awesome-r2+d2-houses-eight-game-consoles-and-projector
http://gizmodo.com/290570/r2+d2-home-theater-gets-upgraded-still-cant-project-hdtv-calculate-hyperspace-jumps
http://gizmodo.com/363426/r2+d2-pc-case-mod-warps-us-into-hyperspace
http://gizmodo.com/5180710/120-r2d2-computer-fashioned-from-love-and-a-trash-can
http://kotaku.com/5640721/
p.s. my google chrome spell check wants me to change "Droid" to "Druid". Oh, spell check how I simultaneously love and hate thee!
p.p.s It doesn't recognise "google" identity-crisis fail?
http://gizmodo.com/5364521/awesome-r2+d2-houses-eight-game-consoles-and-projector
http://gizmodo.com/290570/r2+d2-home-theater-gets-upgraded-still-cant-project-hdtv-calculate-hyperspace-jumps
http://gizmodo.com/363426/r2+d2-pc-case-mod-warps-us-into-hyperspace
http://gizmodo.com/5180710/120-r2d2-computer-fashioned-from-love-and-a-trash-can
http://kotaku.com/5640721/
The Joys of Second Year
So, as my blog title suggests I am a bit of a nerd-girl, so it may not come as much of a shock, that I actually like school... In fact, I love it! I'm a bit of an introvert, and very much a homebody, so for me, school means more than JUST learning (which I enjoy) but also social interaction. It doesn't take too much effort for me to talk to a friend, or be nice to a classmate. But it is hard for me to arrange and/or plan hang-outs, so school is very much a big part of my social scene.
Also, as a second year university student, I am predominantly in classes that pertain to my major, that I find interesting and fun! I'm nearly rid of icky generalized first year classes (I do have a few still).
This semester I am taking a first year Socio-cultural Anthropology course(AN 101), 3 second year Archaeology courses (AR/AN 220: Human Osteology, AR 241: Historical Archaeology of North America 1500-1900, and AR 244: Archaeology and the Physical Sciences) as well as a First year Geology class (GL 101) which I've already skipped once because I didn't feel well and it kinda, sorta sucks the life out of me...
It's only been a week but I can already tell that AR 244 is going to be my favourite lecture, and AR 220(-2) my favourite lab! 244 has one of (if not) my favourite profs from last year, and despite the necessity to write a mile a minute, and the fact that it's 7-10pm on Glee night, I have the most fun learning in that class!! The 220-2 lab, is basically an hour-to an hour and a half of examining, identifying, (and playing) with bones! I have a very weird affinity for bones, and I can tell I am going to have so, SO, SO much fun learning the ins and outs of the human skeletal system!
One of my favourite television shows is Bones, and while I assembled a disarticulated hand I sang "dancing phalanges" while wiggling my fingers in the air... if you get that reference I officially love you! I am really excited to start watching it again this week! I mean I'm gutted that I have to miss Glee (of course I'll just watch it online later...) but I am happy that I get to watch at least one of my favourite shows as it airs! (My other show that I never miss is The Vampire Diaries, but the channel I watch it on is a day behind so I have to be careful of spoilers)
It's only been a week and I've already met up and/or run into seven different friends, only one of which I have a class with! I've also met a new friend, and gotten to know better some of my acquaintances from classes last year. I can tell that this year is going to suck less and be made of more awesome then last year, and I am going to enjoy myself more than I can even imagine!
"Girl put your records on/ tell me your favourite songs/ go ahead put your hair down!/ Sapphire and faded jeans/ I hope you get your dreams/ Just go ahead, let your hair down!"
Also, as a second year university student, I am predominantly in classes that pertain to my major, that I find interesting and fun! I'm nearly rid of icky generalized first year classes (I do have a few still).
This semester I am taking a first year Socio-cultural Anthropology course(AN 101), 3 second year Archaeology courses (AR/AN 220: Human Osteology, AR 241: Historical Archaeology of North America 1500-1900, and AR 244: Archaeology and the Physical Sciences) as well as a First year Geology class (GL 101) which I've already skipped once because I didn't feel well and it kinda, sorta sucks the life out of me...
It's only been a week but I can already tell that AR 244 is going to be my favourite lecture, and AR 220(-2) my favourite lab! 244 has one of (if not) my favourite profs from last year, and despite the necessity to write a mile a minute, and the fact that it's 7-10pm on Glee night, I have the most fun learning in that class!! The 220-2 lab, is basically an hour-to an hour and a half of examining, identifying, (and playing) with bones! I have a very weird affinity for bones, and I can tell I am going to have so, SO, SO much fun learning the ins and outs of the human skeletal system!
One of my favourite television shows is Bones, and while I assembled a disarticulated hand I sang "dancing phalanges" while wiggling my fingers in the air... if you get that reference I officially love you! I am really excited to start watching it again this week! I mean I'm gutted that I have to miss Glee (of course I'll just watch it online later...) but I am happy that I get to watch at least one of my favourite shows as it airs! (My other show that I never miss is The Vampire Diaries, but the channel I watch it on is a day behind so I have to be careful of spoilers)
It's only been a week and I've already met up and/or run into seven different friends, only one of which I have a class with! I've also met a new friend, and gotten to know better some of my acquaintances from classes last year. I can tell that this year is going to suck less and be made of more awesome then last year, and I am going to enjoy myself more than I can even imagine!
"Girl put your records on/ tell me your favourite songs/ go ahead put your hair down!/ Sapphire and faded jeans/ I hope you get your dreams/ Just go ahead, let your hair down!"
Friday, September 3, 2010
Mixed emotions...
So about an hour ago I was gearing up to write a depressingly sad post about my body-issues and how my mother always makes me feel worse about myself, and how I was basically one step away from becoming annorexic in grade nine, I put on alot of weight since then and I currently only eat about a meal and a half with some random snacking. But beacuse I don't excersize and I eat alot carbs and fats, and mom is only ever around for my bigger meal she doesn't get it. Today she actually said "That looks like an awful lot for someone who doesn't excersize, that' how you pack on pounds... " Then she said somthing about how she doesn't mean to offend me, but how could it not? It took all joy out of my dinner, and I ended up wrapping up what was left (over half) even though I was still hungry. I was about to write all that, only I was in a far more hurt and vulnerable place an hour ago.
I literally had this window open and was about to start a post I would've named either "Maybe I should just stop eating" or "If I was skinny would you love me?" but as I was about to start typeing dad called up the stairs "Alissa, I'm going to the store if you need to get out of the house!". Boy did I ever! Dad is such a Ilifesaver, my mood literally did a 180* as I stepped outside... I'm still alittle sad, but between this blog and mylittle outing, that was all the therapy I needed. I might still text my best-friend, see if she can go out later, because I need to spend some time with someone who won't tear me down.
I think the hardest part about my mother's criticsm, isn't that it's true, I COULD stand to lose 20 pounds... but it's that she's no twig herself and she always seems to sense when I'm happy with myself and chooses THAT moment to strike. As if I don't deserve to have good self-worth... Anyway, I should drop it,before I lose it again. She doesn't mean to hurt me this much, I think she hates herself a little and sees herself in me, and I feel like if she can mold me into the dream-girl she wishes she was then she'd feel better about herself. It's not right, and it's alot to live with, but I understand that she thinks she's helping me...
It's just hard when it feels like she only compliaments me when it looks like I've lost weight, and that she's quick to tell me to watch what I eat, but whatever.
"If I kiss you where it's sore/ If I kiss you where it's sore/ Will you feel better, better, better?/ Will you feel anything at all?/ Will you feel better, better, better?/Will you feel anything at all?"
I literally had this window open and was about to start a post I would've named either "Maybe I should just stop eating" or "If I was skinny would you love me?" but as I was about to start typeing dad called up the stairs "Alissa, I'm going to the store if you need to get out of the house!". Boy did I ever! Dad is such a Ilifesaver, my mood literally did a 180* as I stepped outside... I'm still alittle sad, but between this blog and mylittle outing, that was all the therapy I needed. I might still text my best-friend, see if she can go out later, because I need to spend some time with someone who won't tear me down.
I think the hardest part about my mother's criticsm, isn't that it's true, I COULD stand to lose 20 pounds... but it's that she's no twig herself and she always seems to sense when I'm happy with myself and chooses THAT moment to strike. As if I don't deserve to have good self-worth... Anyway, I should drop it,before I lose it again. She doesn't mean to hurt me this much, I think she hates herself a little and sees herself in me, and I feel like if she can mold me into the dream-girl she wishes she was then she'd feel better about herself. It's not right, and it's alot to live with, but I understand that she thinks she's helping me...
It's just hard when it feels like she only compliaments me when it looks like I've lost weight, and that she's quick to tell me to watch what I eat, but whatever.
"If I kiss you where it's sore/ If I kiss you where it's sore/ Will you feel better, better, better?/ Will you feel anything at all?/ Will you feel better, better, better?/Will you feel anything at all?"
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
CAN YOU PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE FOR FIVE MINUTES!?!?
Sorry for the caps locks guys, but I'm REALLY frustrated at my mother right now...
Yesterday in the car she talked at me for over half an hour about what's missing in my life, what's wrong with me, whether or not I should see a shrink, how I can't afford not to have a job, how even though I'm just like my dad and everyone loves us I fail at life because I don't communicate and I'm happy to sit by myself and do nothing... How someday I'll make a wondeful mom because of that, but for now I need to do something worthwhile... etc. etc. etc.
4 O'clock today, "Why are the windows open with the air-conditioning!?" (I dunno, you did that before you left this morning, all the windows looked closed and locked to me, sorry I didn't check behind the drapes in the living room...)
4:30 "What have you done today...?" *tells her* "Did you go online and look for jobs?" (No, I just turned my computer on 5 minutes ago...) "OH! Good for you!"
4:35 "So you didn't look for a job yet? I guess it's ok since you were busy..."
At dnner "Family meeting time!"
20 minutes ago *Walks in looks at mess* "You doing laundry soon?" (Yeah, soon...)
*looks over at corner* "I noticed that corner looked nicer... this morning... I think you need to re-organise your desk, so that you can make your shelf look nice..."
A few minutes ago "What are yo doing?" (*looks down at laptop* Internet...)
"Are you talking to real people?" (Yes) "Real people that you actually know?" (uh, yes...) "People you know, who you could meet on the street?" (YES!)
GAHHHHHHH She makes me so angry sometimes!!!
Just leave me alone for five freaking minutes!!!
I'm careful, who gives a crap if I'm talking to someone I met at school or someone only online... I'm carefull. This is 20freaking10... The internet is more than some annonymous name... I don't meet people IRL, I check more than one portal before I really befriend someone, I don't give out personal infomation... GOSH! Enter the FUCKING future and LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!
I'm probably going to regret this later... and I might take it down when I'm in a calmer mood... But for now I'm pissed, and I don't want to blowup at her, because that would just make her worse!!!
I need to get out of here!
Yesterday in the car she talked at me for over half an hour about what's missing in my life, what's wrong with me, whether or not I should see a shrink, how I can't afford not to have a job, how even though I'm just like my dad and everyone loves us I fail at life because I don't communicate and I'm happy to sit by myself and do nothing... How someday I'll make a wondeful mom because of that, but for now I need to do something worthwhile... etc. etc. etc.
4 O'clock today, "Why are the windows open with the air-conditioning!?" (I dunno, you did that before you left this morning, all the windows looked closed and locked to me, sorry I didn't check behind the drapes in the living room...)
4:30 "What have you done today...?" *tells her* "Did you go online and look for jobs?" (No, I just turned my computer on 5 minutes ago...) "OH! Good for you!"
4:35 "So you didn't look for a job yet? I guess it's ok since you were busy..."
At dnner "Family meeting time!"
20 minutes ago *Walks in looks at mess* "You doing laundry soon?" (Yeah, soon...)
*looks over at corner* "I noticed that corner looked nicer... this morning... I think you need to re-organise your desk, so that you can make your shelf look nice..."
A few minutes ago "What are yo doing?" (*looks down at laptop* Internet...)
"Are you talking to real people?" (Yes) "Real people that you actually know?" (uh, yes...) "People you know, who you could meet on the street?" (YES!)
GAHHHHHHH She makes me so angry sometimes!!!
Just leave me alone for five freaking minutes!!!
I'm careful, who gives a crap if I'm talking to someone I met at school or someone only online... I'm carefull. This is 20freaking10... The internet is more than some annonymous name... I don't meet people IRL, I check more than one portal before I really befriend someone, I don't give out personal infomation... GOSH! Enter the FUCKING future and LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!
I'm probably going to regret this later... and I might take it down when I'm in a calmer mood... But for now I'm pissed, and I don't want to blowup at her, because that would just make her worse!!!
I need to get out of here!
Friday, August 27, 2010
This week in a nutshell...
Yesterdy I was helping Jules pack up her room and fit everything into our little car, there will be just enought room for the two of us and mom to drive her down to Philly tomorrow... I'm not looking forward to the 9 hour drive, or saying goodbye to my little sister. But it will be fun helping her set up her room, saying hi to friends and family, and meeting her new roommate...
Last year, I got into a routine where I didn't miss her when she was gone, but when she came home we fell right back into being best-friends... I LOVE my sister, and we do ALOT together, but I don't really notice when people are missing in my life. I feel like a huge bitch saying that, because I do love them, and it's not like I don't miss them, I just don't notice... Maybe it's because I don't mind being alone...
Ayway, yesterday the bookstore called and my copy of Mockingjay is FINALY in! And just in time too, I didn't want to go on the trip with out it! I've heard that it's really good, but that i's sad and a lot of people die... which is to be expected, but Suzanne Collins better not let me down, the first two books were AMAZING!!!
I literally did a happy dance a la John Green, and sang "My book is in! My book is in!" I am SUCH a nerd!
Today I'm going to pick it up from the store, as well as run some last minute errands with Dad. Including buying a new GPS so we don't get lost!
Our car has been a little unreliable of late so yesterday daddy showed me how to fix the battery (which has been the biggest trouble) and I feel like a proper Grease monkey! Let's just hope nothing else goes wrong, though because I'm a bit of a one-trick-pony... and I do NOT want to get stranded in the States... Mom's a Yank, so if anything goes wrong I'll defect to her, but like my dad I am a proud Canuk, so I'll just have to play the foriegner card!
Well, my keybord is acting bizzare,(and I've run out of things to say) so I think I shall wrap this post up!
"Jai Guru Deva, Om. Nothing's gonna change my world, nothing's gonna change my world."
*edit* I have corrected spelling mistakes and re-posted this twice allready, my keybord is most definately throwing a hissy fit, so I appologise if it's difficult to read.. but I am not going to correct anything else... I'm tired lol
Last year, I got into a routine where I didn't miss her when she was gone, but when she came home we fell right back into being best-friends... I LOVE my sister, and we do ALOT together, but I don't really notice when people are missing in my life. I feel like a huge bitch saying that, because I do love them, and it's not like I don't miss them, I just don't notice... Maybe it's because I don't mind being alone...
Ayway, yesterday the bookstore called and my copy of Mockingjay is FINALY in! And just in time too, I didn't want to go on the trip with out it! I've heard that it's really good, but that i's sad and a lot of people die... which is to be expected, but Suzanne Collins better not let me down, the first two books were AMAZING!!!
I literally did a happy dance a la John Green, and sang "My book is in! My book is in!" I am SUCH a nerd!
Today I'm going to pick it up from the store, as well as run some last minute errands with Dad. Including buying a new GPS so we don't get lost!
Our car has been a little unreliable of late so yesterday daddy showed me how to fix the battery (which has been the biggest trouble) and I feel like a proper Grease monkey! Let's just hope nothing else goes wrong, though because I'm a bit of a one-trick-pony... and I do NOT want to get stranded in the States... Mom's a Yank, so if anything goes wrong I'll defect to her, but like my dad I am a proud Canuk, so I'll just have to play the foriegner card!
Well, my keybord is acting bizzare,(and I've run out of things to say) so I think I shall wrap this post up!
"Jai Guru Deva, Om. Nothing's gonna change my world, nothing's gonna change my world."
*edit* I have corrected spelling mistakes and re-posted this twice allready, my keybord is most definately throwing a hissy fit, so I appologise if it's difficult to read.. but I am not going to correct anything else... I'm tired lol
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Werewolf girl is bed-ridden... Write?
So, I have come to the conclusion-- after realising, on several occasions, that I get sick near a full moon-- that I must be a werewolf... This may seem bizarre, especially since I have no wolf-like symptoms, nor do I really enjoy werewolf lore. However, I have been told on atleast one ocasion that I resemble a werewolf, something about my eyes... I dunno. I have also taken a few of those oh-so-acurate Facebook quizzes in which I have been dubed the Werewolf personality. Add to that that last night (exactly one week before the Full Moon) I fell ill. And my imagination is kinda in hyperdrive.
I'm feeling pretty terrible today, and for the time-being I have put myslef on bed rest. While I am lying around doing nothing I have decided that I *might*, just might, try to get back to writing my novel... I miss my characters, I feel guilty about leaving them in limbo, and I feel like it's something I should realy try to get back to. I don't want to neglect it forever, until I am old and my biggest regret is that I never even finished my first novel.
Don't get me wrong, I have no desire to become an author, and I wouldn't mind if I never published... But I want to atleast have the satisfaction of finishing what I started. Plus, if I am ever going to have the bragging rights of 'writing a novel' I should atleast be able to say that I have a completed manuscript, not a partial draft...
That being said, I have only promised to try, not to do, and DEFINATELY not to finish, I am nowhere near that point.
Anyway...
"Do you believe in life after love?/ I can feel something inside me saying/ I really don't think you're strong enough/ No!"
I'm feeling pretty terrible today, and for the time-being I have put myslef on bed rest. While I am lying around doing nothing I have decided that I *might*, just might, try to get back to writing my novel... I miss my characters, I feel guilty about leaving them in limbo, and I feel like it's something I should realy try to get back to. I don't want to neglect it forever, until I am old and my biggest regret is that I never even finished my first novel.
Don't get me wrong, I have no desire to become an author, and I wouldn't mind if I never published... But I want to atleast have the satisfaction of finishing what I started. Plus, if I am ever going to have the bragging rights of 'writing a novel' I should atleast be able to say that I have a completed manuscript, not a partial draft...
That being said, I have only promised to try, not to do, and DEFINATELY not to finish, I am nowhere near that point.
Anyway...
"Do you believe in life after love?/ I can feel something inside me saying/ I really don't think you're strong enough/ No!"
Sunday, August 15, 2010
If I could TURN back TIME...
That's right everybody!!! The Harry Potter Exhibit went smashingly! If I had a Time-Turner I'd relive it again, and again, and again! Thing is... I *DO* have a Time-Turner a brand-spanking new one purchased today by moi in the gift shop!!! I was reeeeeeaaaaaallllllllllllly tempted to buy the fancy proper gold-plated metal-alloy necklace but it was $60, so I got the $11 plastic one, complete with bonus sticker set! And of course, since we went to church before I *tried* to do my hair nice-ish, but for once in my life, I was completely fine with it frizzing out, in fact, while at the centre I actively encouraged it to bush up... I mean who WOULDN'T want to look like Hermione while at the HP exhibit? Especially while rockin' a knock-off Time-turner! XD
Since buying it this afternoon though, I've realised something... It's damn lucky I'm NOT Hermione, and I DON'T have magical gifts... because I just keep spinning, and spinning, and SPINNING it!! I mean think of the consequences if it had been real! Also my little brother only knows the Unforgivable spells and Expelliarmus... so if magic were real there would be quite the body count around that boy...
During the car-ride there I read some more from my copy of The Hunger Games, andI have to admit, I'm REALLY liking it!!! I think I mentioned in an earlier post, that I had heard it was good, and bought both it and it's sequel with only a cusory glance at the back of the book... So I wasn't entirely prepared for the FEEL of the book. I knew what it was going to be ABOUT, but I had no idea what it would be LIKE... Does that make any sense?
When I was reading the back of the book "North America" "Panem" and a few other words jumped out at me, and being a big Pre-historical Fiction dork I took it to mean it was going to be set in North America BEFORE it was known as North America, turns out it's AFTER what's left! o.0 You can imagine my surprize the first time I read the word "electricity"...
Now, normally I am not all that into distopian... anything, really. But hey, I had paid for the books, the cover was already starting to get all jacked-up... and I had promised myself I'd give it a shot. I mean, all those people I admire couldn't be wrong, could they? The writing style was easy, to follow, the charaters were both relateable and likeable... and I had already started.
And I am SO glad I did! I haven't even gotten to the Games part, but it is so good. I am really looking forward to finishing it! (and starting Catching Fire)
So if anybody is out there reading this and you aren't sure wether or not to read it. Read it. Even if you don't think you like distopian fantasy... It feels very much modern and in the now, while also being mysterious, and unbelievable... In other words, it's more interesting then fiction writin in our time, but it's not so different that the average schmuck, like me, can't get in to it.
Well, this post is getting rather long, so I guess I'll just end it right here. With my tradition of quoteing whatever song is stuck in my head.
"If I could turn back time/ If I could find a way./ I'd take back those words that would hurt you/ And You'd stay"
p.s. I also bought a Chocolate frog. It was crunchier than I expected. I got Quirrel
Since buying it this afternoon though, I've realised something... It's damn lucky I'm NOT Hermione, and I DON'T have magical gifts... because I just keep spinning, and spinning, and SPINNING it!! I mean think of the consequences if it had been real! Also my little brother only knows the Unforgivable spells and Expelliarmus... so if magic were real there would be quite the body count around that boy...
During the car-ride there I read some more from my copy of The Hunger Games, andI have to admit, I'm REALLY liking it!!! I think I mentioned in an earlier post, that I had heard it was good, and bought both it and it's sequel with only a cusory glance at the back of the book... So I wasn't entirely prepared for the FEEL of the book. I knew what it was going to be ABOUT, but I had no idea what it would be LIKE... Does that make any sense?
When I was reading the back of the book "North America" "Panem" and a few other words jumped out at me, and being a big Pre-historical Fiction dork I took it to mean it was going to be set in North America BEFORE it was known as North America, turns out it's AFTER what's left! o.0 You can imagine my surprize the first time I read the word "electricity"...
Now, normally I am not all that into distopian... anything, really. But hey, I had paid for the books, the cover was already starting to get all jacked-up... and I had promised myself I'd give it a shot. I mean, all those people I admire couldn't be wrong, could they? The writing style was easy, to follow, the charaters were both relateable and likeable... and I had already started.
And I am SO glad I did! I haven't even gotten to the Games part, but it is so good. I am really looking forward to finishing it! (and starting Catching Fire)
So if anybody is out there reading this and you aren't sure wether or not to read it. Read it. Even if you don't think you like distopian fantasy... It feels very much modern and in the now, while also being mysterious, and unbelievable... In other words, it's more interesting then fiction writin in our time, but it's not so different that the average schmuck, like me, can't get in to it.
Well, this post is getting rather long, so I guess I'll just end it right here. With my tradition of quoteing whatever song is stuck in my head.
"If I could turn back time/ If I could find a way./ I'd take back those words that would hurt you/ And You'd stay"
p.s. I also bought a Chocolate frog. It was crunchier than I expected. I got Quirrel
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Toronto's on baby!
So we are FOR SURE going to the HP exhibit tomorrow afternoon! We are leaving early, going to church in Toronto, dropping my sister off at her friends house then mom the boys and I are going, while dad hits up a job-site... This is so exciting! It's actually happening!!!
Over the years I've gotten used to dissapointment as my family has a tendency to make grandiose plans that never end up happening for one reason or another... So the fact that it's the night before, and we are still going is, like, uber exciting...
Did I mention I'm excited?
I hope it lives up to my expectations, and doesn't dissapoint... I guess I will find out soon enough :/ I hope I get sorted into the right house! :P
"I'm a Hufflepuff/ And I'm super tough/ Gonna take all those death eaters down/ Guitar practicing/ Quidditch champion/ Even got a lightning bolt scar/ I might be a wizard rock star"
Over the years I've gotten used to dissapointment as my family has a tendency to make grandiose plans that never end up happening for one reason or another... So the fact that it's the night before, and we are still going is, like, uber exciting...
Did I mention I'm excited?
I hope it lives up to my expectations, and doesn't dissapoint... I guess I will find out soon enough :/ I hope I get sorted into the right house! :P
"I'm a Hufflepuff/ And I'm super tough/ Gonna take all those death eaters down/ Guitar practicing/ Quidditch champion/ Even got a lightning bolt scar/ I might be a wizard rock star"
Take Me Away...
I'm stir crazy, and I need to get away... I think I just heard my parents have a money fight about how I don't have a job...
I'm going to see a movie with my friend Robin, and I can't wait to get out for a while...
Tomorrow we are hoping to go as a family to see the Harry Potter exhibit in Toronto while it's still here, so hopefully that goes well :)
I really want to get a DFTBA Mystery shirt but I can't seem to get PayPal to work... hopefully my dad and I can figure it out before they run out... I can always count on my dad.
Next friday is my best friends "19th" birthday party... In as much as she'll be at the other end of the province for her real one and she is celebrating here before she leaves.. Later that weekend the family is hoping to go to Tobermory, which is probably my favourite place I've ever been this side of the 'Pond'!
Then the week after that we take my sister back to school in Pennsylvania... I can't even imagine what it will be like with her gone. Even though we did this last year.
"Take me away,/Take me far away from here/ I will run with you/ Don't be afraid/ Navigate and I will steer/ Into the sun, we will run"
I'm going to see a movie with my friend Robin, and I can't wait to get out for a while...
Tomorrow we are hoping to go as a family to see the Harry Potter exhibit in Toronto while it's still here, so hopefully that goes well :)
I really want to get a DFTBA Mystery shirt but I can't seem to get PayPal to work... hopefully my dad and I can figure it out before they run out... I can always count on my dad.
Next friday is my best friends "19th" birthday party... In as much as she'll be at the other end of the province for her real one and she is celebrating here before she leaves.. Later that weekend the family is hoping to go to Tobermory, which is probably my favourite place I've ever been this side of the 'Pond'!
Then the week after that we take my sister back to school in Pennsylvania... I can't even imagine what it will be like with her gone. Even though we did this last year.
"Take me away,/Take me far away from here/ I will run with you/ Don't be afraid/ Navigate and I will steer/ Into the sun, we will run"
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Today turned out nothing like I was expecting...
So the cat I'm sitting tried to kill mr, the camp I'm running had one kid, I didn't go to the movies with my bestfriend because my phone is dumb, and I didn't buy R2, or finish BTTF...
I DID however have a danceparty with my brother, write a goofy story, vacume and do laudry. But most importantly, I went to Chapters and bought some books. I ALMOST bought R2 but when I got there they also had Chewy and I couldn't decide. That and my mother asked me to buy a book for Grandma's birthday because she didn't have any money on her. But I'll definately go back sometime soon and get BOTH! ;D
I ended up buying The Hunger Games, and Catching Fire because I've heard good things about them and wanted to give it a try. They sound interesting, and worst comes to worst I only read them once...
Anyway.
"He's climbing in your window, snatching your people up/ tryin to rape 'em/ so y'all better hide your kids, hide your wife/ (hide your kids, hide your wife)/ hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husbands, cuz they rapin errybody out here!"
I DID however have a danceparty with my brother, write a goofy story, vacume and do laudry. But most importantly, I went to Chapters and bought some books. I ALMOST bought R2 but when I got there they also had Chewy and I couldn't decide. That and my mother asked me to buy a book for Grandma's birthday because she didn't have any money on her. But I'll definately go back sometime soon and get BOTH! ;D
I ended up buying The Hunger Games, and Catching Fire because I've heard good things about them and wanted to give it a try. They sound interesting, and worst comes to worst I only read them once...
Anyway.
"He's climbing in your window, snatching your people up/ tryin to rape 'em/ so y'all better hide your kids, hide your wife/ (hide your kids, hide your wife)/ hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husbands, cuz they rapin errybody out here!"
I seriously want to kill my stupid phone...
and I can't even afford a new one!
"We could use a good pilot/ A pilot like you/ Don’t turn your back on your friends now/ We’re taking heavy fire"
"We could use a good pilot/ A pilot like you/ Don’t turn your back on your friends now/ We’re taking heavy fire"
I EFFING HATE MY PHONE!!!!!!!!
It doesn't work, and ruins EVERYTHING! I missed an opertunity to go out with my best friend! It NEVER works when I need it!!!!! I'm so mad I just want to cry!!!! FML seriously! FML
Crazy story I wrote with my brother...
Here is a lovely story my brother and I wrote by cutting up stories and putting them together in a new way... It gets sillier towards the end with the adition of Superheroes, the Star Wars (acapella) song [from Youtube] and Harry Potter (with a pinch of AVPM... Enjoy!
Jack fell down and Jill came and broke his crown.
Tumbling after.
Went up the hill, Jack and Jill, to fetch a pail of water.
Mary went to catch the cat to catch the bird.
She swallowed a horse.
The Otter thought it was all in fun, round and round the mullberry bush.
And everywhere that mary went, there was an old Lady who swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.
Along came a spider to school one day --All the kings horses, and all the kings men frightened Miss Muffett away.
Little Miss Muffett laughed and played, which was against the rules.
Pop! Goes the weasle.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. And everywhere that Mary went, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall!
It made the children laugh and play. And everywhere that Mary went it followed her to school, that wiggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.
Perhaps she'll die.
Mary had a litle lamb, which was against the rules. Little lamb, I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.
And everywhere that Mary went she swallowed a dog to catch the cat, who sat down beside her. (On her tuffett)
The Lamb was sure to go, eating her curds and whey.
Hagrid had a pet Spiderman, and everywhere that Mary went... Voldemort killed him.
Kiss a wookie, spins a web... Look in the sky!
Is it a bird, Rumbleroar?
Three unforgivable curses, Mary went, one way ticket to Azkaban!
Mad-eye Moody kicked a droid. Severus Snape flew off through an astoroid.
Dumbledore climbs up walls. He survived Harry Potter. He can fly.
It's Superman!
(to catch the spider)
Crucio! Spiderman... We love it!
Mary went Avada Kedavra!
She died of course.
Jack fell down and Jill came and broke his crown.
Tumbling after.
Went up the hill, Jack and Jill, to fetch a pail of water.
Mary went to catch the cat to catch the bird.
She swallowed a horse.
The Otter thought it was all in fun, round and round the mullberry bush.
And everywhere that mary went, there was an old Lady who swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.
Along came a spider to school one day --All the kings horses, and all the kings men frightened Miss Muffett away.
Little Miss Muffett laughed and played, which was against the rules.
Pop! Goes the weasle.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. And everywhere that Mary went, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall!
It made the children laugh and play. And everywhere that Mary went it followed her to school, that wiggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.
Perhaps she'll die.
Mary had a litle lamb, which was against the rules. Little lamb, I don't know why she swallowed a fly.
Perhaps she'll die.
And everywhere that Mary went she swallowed a dog to catch the cat, who sat down beside her. (On her tuffett)
The Lamb was sure to go, eating her curds and whey.
Hagrid had a pet Spiderman, and everywhere that Mary went... Voldemort killed him.
Kiss a wookie, spins a web... Look in the sky!
Is it a bird, Rumbleroar?
Three unforgivable curses, Mary went, one way ticket to Azkaban!
Mad-eye Moody kicked a droid. Severus Snape flew off through an astoroid.
Dumbledore climbs up walls. He survived Harry Potter. He can fly.
It's Superman!
(to catch the spider)
Crucio! Spiderman... We love it!
Mary went Avada Kedavra!
She died of course.
Charlie St. Cloud, R2D2, BTTF3, and the cat that tried to kill me
So I'm going to see Charlie St. Cloud tonight with my bestfriend, AND since it's cheap tuesday, I might splurge and buy the R2D2 doll at the bookstore across the street from the theatre! I am more excited about this then I probaby should be... especially since the bulk of the excitement comes from R2.
Sometime later this week I need to finish my Back To The Future marathon with my sister, I finished part II but she gave up and went to bed about half-way through... She missed the alternative reality in which Biff is all-powerfull!! But there is noway I am letting her miss part III it is my absolute FAV!
Finally the cat that tried to kill me... first let me shower up while the bathroom is free... Mmmn, that's better. it's freaking hot outside, and even though the shower barely works it was just what I needed.
Anyway, killer cat... So one thing you should probably know about me, I am DEATHLY afraid of falling. Like, heights don't bother me, it's the idea I could fall that does the trick. For instance I was more afraid the last time I got on and off an escalator then the time I climbed to the top of the Eiffle Tower, or walked accross the bridge overlooking Montmerency Falls. This is also why I cried like a baby when I rode a big Ferris Wheel, but airplanes are no problem.
So, as you may or may not know from yesterday's post, one of the things I have going on this week (that will hopefully keep my mom content) is cat-sitting for my neighbour... Well, this cat is one of the fattest, nicest cats I've ever known. Normally. However today, when I went to give him his breakfast, he thought it would be a good idea to be waiting for me on the top of the reading loft... The loft is basically a second floor, except it's only above the living room, and you need to climb a ladder to get there. And I HATE ladders. So Oreo was just chillin up there, and wouldn't come down, meowing pitifully all the while. So I decide to climb to the top of the ladder and see if he'll come over to me...
He didn't. So I plucked up all the courage I could muster and climbed all the way up, and on to the loft.
Now he comes over to me, once I'm allready up there and terrified! Grrreaatt..
(On a side note Kid #2's mom just called. He isn't coming today or Friday anymore... But she's still going to pay me. Weird, but I'm not complaining)
So anyway, Oreo comes over to me, and starts rubbing up against me, normally this behaviour would be rewarded... but I was sitting at the precipice of an ominous ledge, or at least that's how I saw it... I swear I thought he was trying to push me off, and I was getting ready to kill him. Instead I just pushed him away and started to freak out saying things like, "If you push me, and I fall and die, I SWEAR I am going to hurt you!" Civil I know.
So there I was, stuck (and yes I was stuck, my biggest problem is getting back on the ladder once I am up. If I go face first I will most definately fall, if I crawl backwards I fear I will miss the steps completely and plummet to my death --Off a 8 foot ledge-- but to my death none the less!) and Oreo the murderer was trying to PUSH me off while I was trying to get myself safely on the ladder. I Literally contemplated calling my sister to come rescue me, only the front door was locked... and she is a whole lot braver than I and would probably have laughed at me.
After a few minutes I FINALLY got to the ladder without dieing, and slowly go down one rung at a time, calling Oreo as I went down, I got about halfwaly down, the perfect distance to reach up and grab the cat, without falling, but not being so far down that he would fall on me... When the damn cat climbs down the ladder all by himself!!!
Tomorrow i am going TO KILL HIM!!! Only, not because he needs to be healthy and alive if I want to get paid. But the temptation is definately there.
"Just like Beggar’s Canyon back home/ Shooting womp rats in my T-16/ It’s not over yet, this is it boys/ Ready for anything"
Sometime later this week I need to finish my Back To The Future marathon with my sister, I finished part II but she gave up and went to bed about half-way through... She missed the alternative reality in which Biff is all-powerfull!! But there is noway I am letting her miss part III it is my absolute FAV!
Finally the cat that tried to kill me... first let me shower up while the bathroom is free... Mmmn, that's better. it's freaking hot outside, and even though the shower barely works it was just what I needed.
Anyway, killer cat... So one thing you should probably know about me, I am DEATHLY afraid of falling. Like, heights don't bother me, it's the idea I could fall that does the trick. For instance I was more afraid the last time I got on and off an escalator then the time I climbed to the top of the Eiffle Tower, or walked accross the bridge overlooking Montmerency Falls. This is also why I cried like a baby when I rode a big Ferris Wheel, but airplanes are no problem.
So, as you may or may not know from yesterday's post, one of the things I have going on this week (that will hopefully keep my mom content) is cat-sitting for my neighbour... Well, this cat is one of the fattest, nicest cats I've ever known. Normally. However today, when I went to give him his breakfast, he thought it would be a good idea to be waiting for me on the top of the reading loft... The loft is basically a second floor, except it's only above the living room, and you need to climb a ladder to get there. And I HATE ladders. So Oreo was just chillin up there, and wouldn't come down, meowing pitifully all the while. So I decide to climb to the top of the ladder and see if he'll come over to me...
He didn't. So I plucked up all the courage I could muster and climbed all the way up, and on to the loft.
Now he comes over to me, once I'm allready up there and terrified! Grrreaatt..
(On a side note Kid #2's mom just called. He isn't coming today or Friday anymore... But she's still going to pay me. Weird, but I'm not complaining)
So anyway, Oreo comes over to me, and starts rubbing up against me, normally this behaviour would be rewarded... but I was sitting at the precipice of an ominous ledge, or at least that's how I saw it... I swear I thought he was trying to push me off, and I was getting ready to kill him. Instead I just pushed him away and started to freak out saying things like, "If you push me, and I fall and die, I SWEAR I am going to hurt you!" Civil I know.
So there I was, stuck (and yes I was stuck, my biggest problem is getting back on the ladder once I am up. If I go face first I will most definately fall, if I crawl backwards I fear I will miss the steps completely and plummet to my death --Off a 8 foot ledge-- but to my death none the less!) and Oreo the murderer was trying to PUSH me off while I was trying to get myself safely on the ladder. I Literally contemplated calling my sister to come rescue me, only the front door was locked... and she is a whole lot braver than I and would probably have laughed at me.
After a few minutes I FINALLY got to the ladder without dieing, and slowly go down one rung at a time, calling Oreo as I went down, I got about halfwaly down, the perfect distance to reach up and grab the cat, without falling, but not being so far down that he would fall on me... When the damn cat climbs down the ladder all by himself!!!
Tomorrow i am going TO KILL HIM!!! Only, not because he needs to be healthy and alive if I want to get paid. But the temptation is definately there.
"Just like Beggar’s Canyon back home/ Shooting womp rats in my T-16/ It’s not over yet, this is it boys/ Ready for anything"
I've got camp all week... HELP?!
So this week I'm babysitting my brother and one of his friends for four hours every afternoon. And I can't just let them play on their own, because I marketed it as a camp... I jus didn't get as many kids as I was hoping... I've got some fun ideas, but I don't know how well they will work until I try them. (Not to mention how long they will last!) At least they are sweet kids and I am getting paid!!
Monday, August 9, 2010
I feel better already!
I have cat-sitting, camp, and girls night out with one of my best friends to look forward to tomorrow. Not to mention, the mural I've been planning all summer is finally done. I feel acomplished, and I hope my mother does too. I feel like she is at the root of but also the solution to the angst I've been feeling recently. She means well, and is just trying to light a fire under my lazy ass. She wants me to live up to my potential, and I guess it's flattering --in a way--, but the way she does it makes me feel like she's judging me, and I'm not living up to her expectaions.
"Someday I'll fly away, leave all this to yesterday. Why live life from dream to dream, and dread the day when dreaming ends?"
"Someday I'll fly away, leave all this to yesterday. Why live life from dream to dream, and dread the day when dreaming ends?"
Watching Back To The Future to get me out of this funk...
I am also sad because I missed BOTH of Sir Paul McCartney's Toronto shows...
Sometimes I just want to cry. I'm trapped
These four walls can be so sufficating sometimes. I can't stand it in this house. Not because I have a shitty family life, because I don't. My parents are still married and more impressively still love each other. I get along just fine with my siblings. We don't have much money, but generally we live a happy, comfortable life. But sometimes my mother drives me crazy. Her mood swings give me whiplash, and she does these little things that just get under my skin. Like chooseing a family photo for her Facebook DP, that just so happens to be not only VERY unflattering to me, but the thumbnail is literally ONLY of me! What makes a picture of your daughter, at one of her heaviest points (when she has allready told you not to post pictures of her) a good choice for your profile?
Steam and Creativity
I created this blog so I could release some steam, and occasionally post something creative and/or productive that isn't relevent to my other blog.
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